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Some of you may know that I’m studying to become an internationally board certified lactation consultant. One of many requirements is to have accumulated 1,000 hours of clinical experience prior to sitting for the test. Easy ask, however, I now had to log hours from 2021 until now. I’ve been procrastinating a few things and this was on the list of daunting tasks!
I sat down and began to scour my calendar to correlate dates, hours, locations and clients. It was such a humbling experience to see how my business had grown and to realize that my babies were getting bigger! I was able to recall each birth, postpartum and lactation contact with my families and it brought me so much joy to know that I’ve impacted so many lives.
Yet there was a sense of utter exhaustion. I realized that I rarely said no when scheduling, which often set me up to work several days in a row and drive long distances. Fun fact: I hate driving! I was not scheduling vacations or days off. I was showing up for everyone but myself, a common thread in my life.
You see when you’re a healer working in a healing profession, it takes a toll. I’m an introvert by nature which is a popular title for people to claim nowadays. I’ve been one since highschool. I love my home and my bed. I love meditation/prayer, yoga and relaxation. None of which I am consistently doing. Fortunately, I have changed my poor habits of not pouring into myself but I realized it is time to tighten up AGAIN. I realize that I have to be intentional with this aspect of my life.
I was dreading the task of logging my hours maybe because subconsciously I would have to address why I’m feeling rundown and tired. I’m hard on myself. I expect excellence from my circle and that begins with me. This birthday season, I am leaning back into the softer side of Shanita Joy. More rest, more exercise and better eating habits (the hardest part for me). More joy and laughter and most importantly more self appreciation and love. May you follow this wave if you too have been struggling.
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